love

 i love these pics of my boys

in the midst of some karate/ninja/star wars battle

he could be the sloppiest eater i know - and while its disgusting to watch its also quite awesome

spin your wheel of fortune

“Happiness consists more in the small conveniences of pleasures that occur every day,

than in great pieces of good fortune that happen but seldom to a man in the course of his life.”

  - Benjamin Franklin



~ my business is doing well...and i have a lot to do with that

~ lately hormonally i'm a mess - some days really angry...other days really weepy.  today is neither of those days

~ my husband made it home safe again from a business trip.  he is traveling a lot for this job. he doesn't like to travel and hates being away from home so much. he makes this sacrifice for us.

~ i had a spur of the moment coffee date with a very close friend of mine this morning.  she gave me a 5 year journal.  each day of the year asks a simple question. underneath the question are 5 blanks to fill in with your answer...one for each year.  its such a cool book i can hardly stand it

~ my oldest son gave me a hug and told me he loved me simply because i found the earbuds i bought for him yet didn't find in time to put in his stocking

~ i made a simple soup of broth and mini pasta for dinner and ate it along with cocoa truffles

tis the season

::  made 20 costumes for our Christmas pageant this year. can you guess who they are for?

roman soldiers of course! it was such a lovely pageant too.  the kids always do a great job and the music gets better each year.

::  christmas eve brunch was not my shining moment this year.  i woke up at 5:15 in the morning to go grocery shopping to buy food for the brunch.  the eggs turned out rubbery and cold, the pancakes were overdone, the biscuits were from a tube and burnt and the potatoes were bought frozen from a bag!  coffee carafe broke as i was filling it with water. no mimosas even though i had both the juice and the champagne (oh wait - we ended up just drinking champagne so i guess that worked out ok!)  everyone was polite and ate and said it was good - b/c that is what family does and that is all good.

::  while i didn't get to make christmas crackers this year as i had planned - i was able to hide the pickle for the kids....well that is my 18 year old nephew in the front of the tree still searching...so maybe its not only for kids afterall. 

::  after breaking 2 glass pickle ornaments my youngest son decided to sew one that was sure not to break in the future.  my niece found it and is proudly showing off the new unbreakable pickle.

::  christmas eve is huge at my mom's house.  all us "kids" gather in the living room.  here everyone is answering the questions my husband and i have written for our family feud game to be held at our new year's eve party this weekend

:: one of our 2 trees.  this one is fake and is downstairs.  i keep it b/c i bought it off my friend's grandmother.  she was getting old and didn't want to deal with it anymore so i gave her $35 for it.  every year i think of her and the years of happiness she had around this tree. funny thing is - i've never even met her.

::  this one is real and is upstairs.  it stopped drinking water for some reason and didn't get decorated until christmas eve morning.  i think its so pretty though - whatever type of tree it is...... 

:: magically on christmas morning mushrooms appeared on the branches. if i knew how to use my camera i could have taken a nicer picture of them.

::  and finally tea.  my oldest has to have a cup of tea every night.  see that water kettle in the back? someone was cleaning out her cabinets and found it shoved in there - and she gave it to me.  it has become one of my favorite things.  while boiling water on the stove is not hard - i often turn it on and forget about it...and since it doesn't have a whistle i have gotten dangerously close to causing a fire.  this kettle shuts off automatically.  its awesome. 

::  oh and see that bottle of wine in the very back? chocovine.  chocolate wine.  yummy and dangerous

dec 23. right now

 overexposed

::  sitting at a cluttered kitchen table planning the next 24 hours. gift wrap reminds me of the presents i still need to buy

::  deciding what to prepare for tomorrow's brunch - do i cook the same things i've been making every year? the food i can prepare while on autopilot? or try something new? something i'll have to think about, slow down for

::  drinking coffee that lately has been upsetting my stomach - and knowing its time to switch to tea for awhile

soft and fuzzy



::  remembering that the reason the table is cluttered is because i spent the night gift wrapping with my son - who declared many times how much fun he was having

::  admitting that a stress-less morning with time to enjoy and focus on family is much better than trying to figure out how to make stratta for the first time

::   anticipating the excitement the next 24 hours will bring

a poem.

i cannot take credit for this poem. but if i did write a poem - i would want it to be this one. 

"What Do Women Want?"

by Kim Addonizio

I want a red dress.

I want it flimsy and cheap,

I want it too tight, I want to wear it

until someone tears it off me.

I want it sleeveless and backless,

this dress, so no one has to guess

what's underneath. I want to walk down

the street past Thrifty's and the hardware store

with all those keys glittering in the window,

past Mr. and Mrs. Wong selling day-old

donuts in their café, past the Guerra brothers

slinging pigs from the truck and onto the dolly,

hoisting the slick snouts over their shoulders.

I want to walk like I'm the only

woman on earth and I can have my pick.

I want that red dress bad.

I want it to confirm

your worst fears about me,

to show you how little I care about you

or anything except what

I want. When I find it, I'll pull that garment

from its hanger like I'm choosing a body

to carry me into this world, through

the birth-cries and the love-cries too,

and I'll wear it like bones, like skin,

it'll be the goddamned

dress they bury me in.

dec 18 - anniversary

recently i went out with some high school friends.  our last stop of the evening was to a local brew pub.  there we met a very high energy waitress. in between yawns and droopy eyes we asked our waitress how she had so much energy at that hour of the night.  she told us that she usually gets her second wind around this time.  at 2am she goes home and meets up with her boyfriend - who bar tends - and because they are so wound up they stay up until 4am just eating and laughing and playing until they finally crash.  then around noon they wake up and start their day.

when she finished telling us her story i sat there quietly

thinking

i found myself envious of her youth

longing for her freedom

do i want to be 21 again?

not really

i like where i am right now.....married 18 years today - two kids - in my 40s

but doesn't it sound like fun to come home at 2am?

full of energy?

not planning further than eating the bag of Cheetos in front of you?

dec 9 - this date...2 years ago!!

i had planned to compare what i did last year on this date to what i am doing today.  turns out I didn't have a blog post for this date.   i was doing...nothing.  well, actually i was doing a lot but i can bet you anything it had nothing to do with Christmas......or preparing for Christmas. 

i had started working full time last fall and i was overwhelmed....very overwhelmed.  decorating for Christmas was the furthest from my mind.  blogging even further.
so i had to go back 2 years to see how exactly i was preparing for the holidays.  i was making christmas crackers.  not crackers the food - but the kind you pull apart - and if you are lucky enough - hard enough to hear the "POP" that occurs right before the litte treats that are inside come flying out.  come to think of it - i'm not even sure we made them at all last year b/c i had simply run out of time - or energy - but most likely both. 

but that was then - and this now.  i plan to make them this year.  i do hope to make them this year.  only time will tell.

Dec 8 - moving too fast

just about two weeks left

i catch myself in moments of panic

afraid i'm going to run out of time to make Christmas simple

doesn't that sound odd - not having the time to create a simple celebration?

as i look around myself at this moment i notice its too bright

too many lights are on in the house

too many tvs are blaring

video games are too loud

step one could be simply turning off some lights

and turning down the noise

light a candle and play some soft music

it doesn't take a lot.........to keep it simple

dec 5 - weekend shots

i am trying to be slow down and be present this season - really i am.......the slowing down seems to be the hardest right now...but every day is a new day and a new chance to try.

a new tradition has become this year's favorite one

stopped to see the phoenix before it went up in flames

in awe of all those geese 

so proud of the gnome he sewed himself

dec 1 - and so it begins.........