i found myself sitting at this very computer
on the eve before december 1st
and i wrote up this post
there are definite similarities between last year and tonight. both nights i came home to dirty laundry, dirty dishes and dirty bathrooms. school papers covered my table then..and looking around me now i find more of the same. and yep - my calendar is quickly filling up with appointments, events and parties.
i'm glad that some things never change
i found myself reading and rereading last year's post. i sounded so overwhelmed...so stressed out...so - not fun. i had just come home from new york - spent a great weekend with my family and our friend - caught up in the hustle and bustle, high energy spirit of manhattan - and yet i wasn't happy.
so what happened between then and now? then i was only working 2x a week. now i am working full time. then my husband worked for someone else. now we are running our own business. then we wondered how we would pay for it all. now - well now we really wonder how we will pay for it all! then i was assuming that i'd blink and christmas would be over! now - i am assuming i will have just the peaceful season i want.
i'm glad some things do change
i wish i knew exactly why i am in a better frame of mind this year. if i knew - i'd write a book and make millions! but i don't know. maybe its yoga. maybe its being used to letting go of my expectations - and just enjoying the ebb and flow of the unknown. maybe its the seemingly endless stack of self-improvment books that find themselves on my nightstand! maybe i am finally learning to be present. i don't know what it is. what i do know is that i like it. i like it a lot.
as i did last year on this night
i will finish my tea
and i will go to bed.
and tomorrow will be another day
and if i'm lucky
it will be a peaceful night